Check Your Life Vest
If you’re going over water, check your life vest as you get on the plane. You’d be surprised. But, passengers who have come before you might have taken yours as a souvenir and you just might not even have one.
Flying Lightning Rods
Let this sink in and eventually you’ll be alright with it. But, planes get hit by lightning…a lot! They are just balls of electric flying up there with the clouds. Doesn’t it make too much sense?
If you look out the window and you can’t see anything, your pilot can’t either. But, he won’t tell you that because he doesn’t want everyone flipping out. The thing is that he’s been trained to use his instruments.
Another thing he won’t tell you is that an engine has failed. It’s not really an issue until they all have. The plane can fly just fine without an engine. No need for the pilot to worry everyone.
Might Not Make It
Because of cutbacks and cost saving strategies, sometimes the plane takes off with just enough fuel. That’s not the best thing, especially when the pilot encounters a situation that is going to reroute the plane or leave it doing circles in the air before it can land at its destination.
Don’t Put Up With Delays
Sometimes, you have the entire trip planned perfectly. You get off the plane to catch a train and you have to be on time. If they say your plane is delayed, demand a flight with a competitor who can get you there on time. Your airline has to put you on that other plane.
Cellphones Don’t Cause Problems
They still tell you to cut them off though. That’s because the policy was put in place before anyone knew anything. Now, they know. But, they just haven’t taken the time to change the policy. That would mean putting out a memo and everything. It’s just too much work.
Flight Times Aren’t Real
It’s a huge guessing game. It IS based on flights in the past and how long they took. But, airlines are actually trying to up their numbers of flights delivered on-time. So flight times are purposely made longer so that they can mark it down as on-time when they land.
No Such Thing As A Water Landing
That’s basically political speech for crashing in water. For whatever reason, pilots have to train for it and hopefully they do it right. But, a water landing just sounds better than what it actually is.
Pilots Take Naps
No, not in the lounge. Not between flights. While they are in the cockpit and you are thousands of feet in the air. They put it on autopilot and they catch Zs. And think, we’re just getting cars to do that.
The Overhead Mask Is Not What You Think It Is
Sure, it makes you feel better to get a brief about the oxygen mask before you fly. It’s good to know it’s there. But, it’s not going to save you in a crash and it’s hardly going to save you if the cabin fills with smoke. They only have about 15 minutes of oxygen and they’re actually for moments when the cabin is losing pressure and the plane has to descend to altitude.
More Germs Than You Can Imagine
The plane does not get sterilized between flights. It might not get cleaned like that for days. People on and off the planes, going to the bathroom, touching stuff, changing diapers, sneezing in their hands, and then touching stuff. Just make sure you have your Antibacterial Hand Sanitizer ready.
Flying With Dead People
You never know who is going to be a passenger on your flight. The airline might be taking a dead person home to his family. Dead animals and all kinds of things are flying along with you. Think about that the next time you board a plane.
Water In The Bathroom
You might not want to hear this because you fly all the time. Or you might have just flown and you have the experience fresh in your mind. But, don’t use the water in the bathroom. Not even to wash your face. It’s nasty.
Pillows And Blankets
Think about it for a second. They don’t get a chance to clean that good between flights. They definitely don’t swap out pillows and blankets for freshly cleaned ones. You’re swapping drool, lice, and boogers with the last person that used them.
Don’t Drink The Water
Unless you see the flight attendant poor the water from a bottle, don’t drink it. They get water from the same place the bathroom water comes from. Don’t let that image get embedded in your mind.
You never know what you’re going to get. People leave their earphones behind. Cleaning people scoop them up and they get sold back to you. Might not want to take that chance.
Hopefully, it never happens to you. But, remain calm if you are ever in a hijack situation. The pilots and attendants know how to alert people on the ground without giving it away. Even if it’s slim, that’s the best chance you have.
Flights into warm weather are actually more dangerous. Of course, the pilots get used to it and some get so good at it that it doesn’t even affect them. But, enjoy your next flight to California knowing you have a higher chance of crashing.
Don’t worry when you’re coming into rainy weather. It’s not like driving a car. Of course, the pilot does use brakes on the wheels. But they also have the engines that they use to reverse power, slow the plane down, and drive it into safety.
Lock Your Bag
You might not think anything will happen to your bag from the time you hand it over until the time you get it back. But, there are people who handle your bags that you can’t trust. Make sure they can’t get into them.
The Art Of Gliding
Sometimes, you’re not even flying. You might be gliding to save fuel. Don’t worry though. The plane can glide quite nicely. In fact, that’s what you’ll be doing if all engines ever fail.
Sometimes, you might have a pilot with very little experience. It’s not supposed to be that way. Young pilots are supposed to be paired with experienced ones. But, what do you think happens when schedules get changed around?
Ashtrays On Planes
Actually, that’s a good indication how old the plane is. At one time, smoking was allowed. A plane with an ashtray flew way back then and hasn’t been upgraded since. Bon voyage!
Tip Your Flight Attendant
If you don’t know already, tip! Tipping is a good thing. Flight attendants can make your life very miserable or they can make it very pleasant. Want an extra drink to get through the flight? Tip!